Today is day 1 of our KISS
(Keep it simple sweetheart)
Discovery...
Top 10 ways to simplify your life
Just say NO!
"Mommy can I PLEASE stay over at Libby's"
"Can you do me a favor""Can I borrow your sweater"
"Can I have a few moments of your time"
"Will you CHAIR the Halloween Party Committee?"
"Can I count on your support?"
You have heard these requests and many more and you have undoubtedly got that all too familiar knot in your stomach.
Your mind is saying NO but your mouth is saying YES
How could you even think of saying NO... what would they all think of you if you said NO?
How difficult would it be if you told your daughter
"No at this time it is inconvenient to stay over your friends house"
Or what would your sister think when you said
"No you can't borrow my cashmere because I planned on wearing it to dinner tonight"
Or how about when the phone rings just as the macaroni begins to boil and the person on the other end asks for "a moment of your time" and you say, flat out "NO"
No is most likely the most difficult word for a lot of us to say... but why?
You don't want to look like the bad guy by saying NO.
In reality when you say yes and compromise yourself and in turn don't have time to do the things that matter most to you & become frustrated because you again said YES when you should have said "thanks for thinking of me however I can't".
You are the bad guy in your own life when you continue to put the needs of others before that of yourself by saying YES
You can say no nicely and you can be firm and direct
You can PRACTICE saying NO
Creative Ways to Say No
(This list is adapted in part from Work Less, Make More-- Stop Working So Hard and Create the Life You Really Want, by Jennifer White.)
Just “No”: “Thanks, I’ll have to pass on that.” (Say it, then shut up.)
The Gracious No: “I really appreciate you asking me, but my time is already committed.”
The “I’m Sorry” No: “I wish I could, but it’s just not going to work right now.”
The “It’s Someone Else’s Decision” No: “I promised my coach (therapist, etc.) I wouldn’t take on any more projects right now. I’m working on creating more balance in my life.”
The “My Family is the Reason” No: “Thanks so much for the invite. That’s the day of my son’s soccer game, and I never miss those.”
The “I Know Someone Else” No: “I just don’t have time right now. Let me recommend someone who may be able to help you.”
The “I’m Already Booked” No: “I appreciate you thinking of me, but I’m afraid I’m already booked that day.”
The “Setting Boundaries” No: “Let me tell you what I CAN do" Then limit the commitment to what will be comfortable for you.
If you’re having a really hard time saying no, try: “Let me think about it, and I’ll get back to you.”
The Gracious No: “I really appreciate you asking me, but my time is already committed.”
The “I’m Sorry” No: “I wish I could, but it’s just not going to work right now.”
The “It’s Someone Else’s Decision” No: “I promised my coach (therapist, etc.) I wouldn’t take on any more projects right now. I’m working on creating more balance in my life.”
The “My Family is the Reason” No: “Thanks so much for the invite. That’s the day of my son’s soccer game, and I never miss those.”
The “I Know Someone Else” No: “I just don’t have time right now. Let me recommend someone who may be able to help you.”
The “I’m Already Booked” No: “I appreciate you thinking of me, but I’m afraid I’m already booked that day.”
The “Setting Boundaries” No: “Let me tell you what I CAN do" Then limit the commitment to what will be comfortable for you.
If you’re having a really hard time saying no, try: “Let me think about it, and I’ll get back to you.”
That's all for now... share your comments with us if you want on how this thought has helped you
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